Schrade Tactical Fountain Pen / Rollerball Pen

Black Cherry---also thematically holiday appropriate!

When I first saw this pen reviewed by the Office Supply Geek, I just about went out of my mind—I HAD TO HAVE THIS PEN. I literally scrabbled around on my iPod touch, sitting on the trunk of my car during a work break (the better to connect to free wifi), navigating frustrating little mobile menus to order this pen RIGHT AWAY. Maybe I could have contacted the manufacturer, asked for a sample to review? But no, no no no I had no patience for that long shot, and ordered the pen immediately. I was, and am not disappointed. And good news for you—the price has gone down since I bought mine!

Also comes in silver and bronze, apparently. Just saw the bronze for the first time online. I THINK I NEED THE BRONZE, TOO.

I don’t know much about anodized aluminum, but I do know that this pen has got it in spades. This is the kind of pen you could beat down a cardboard box with and not break a sweat. This is the kind of pen you clutch in dark alleyways and late night parking lots. Forget that mess about carrying your keys around to attack criminals with, this pen will probably be much more effective (unless your criminals are armed and dangerous; don’t bring a pen to a gunfight, kids).

The least weaponized part

The clip is bolted firmly on, and clipping it on, the clip has the sort of grip strength that falls just shy of rigor mortis levels. But the flare at the end makes it easier to slide onto notebooks, and, bonus, is kind of like a little handle.

The business end---if by "business" you mean the kind typically run by the Mafia.

Here’s where you’ll find all the tactically placed hurt-making parts, and where the cap threads on (for those who’ve always wanted to write with a marathoner’s baton). You’ve got a blunt point at the very end, and a bunch of sharp corners for ripping things like cardboard.

Pretend that this box just tried to rob you.

This is just a little bit of sample damage done to an empty box. Imagine what it might do to metal, glass, the criminal element.

Another stabby part!

Technically, the cap posts—quite sturdily so.

Really only practical for when you need to use the pen to joust

But then you’ve got a pen that’s over seven inches long. That’s a bit much for a pen that isn’t one of those giant novelty pens typically found at the cash registers of quirky stores that are tired of people accidentally walking off with their pens.

Stealthily smooth---and look how clean the nib stays! Seriously, that is also an amazing thing for me.

I am surprised every time I open this pen up to write. One, I’m usually surprised that it still writes at all, no problem, because it’s usually been days—if not weeks—since the last time I used it. Two, I was not expecting a pen so rugged to have such a smooth (probably medium point) nib. The ink flow is great, and it takes standard international short cartridges (comes with a black cartridge (or two? I don’t remember; I never used them)). And for you crazy people who like the body but hate fountain pens:

Why would you hate fountain pens? Why would you want to break my heart like that?

It also comes with a rollerball option! Included with the pen free of charge! Whether you want it or not, you’ve got two options! It’s easy to swap out, and the rollerball (a Schmidt brand fine point, in black ink) writes just fine.

Probably not going to be as tactically useful as all that pointed metal on the fountain pen nib.

Let’s review: this is a pretty awesome pen, by its own merits, and it’s currently at an unbelievable (considering all the metal) price (around $25 at time of writing). Maybe you live in some idyllic countryside bubble of safety descended straight from a single weekend in the 1940s, and the thought of such a dangerous-looking pen terrifies you. That’s fine. But for the rest of us, especially those who want to combine elegant writing with armored accouterments, our pen has come.

Schrade Tactical Fountain Pen in Black

Schrade Tactical Fountain Pen in Brown

Schrade Tactical Fountain Pen in Silver